My Sir.
Jasper Jones. Frosty. The Little Man. My big clown. DogMan. Fammy Puppous. Donkey. Puppous Astronomous. Dumpy. Dump Truck. Franklin. Triangles. Jasp1.com. Mark Douglas. Mister Puppers. Pupton Mass. JJ Cheddars. Best friend.
More names equals more love, and you had all of mine. You safely shepherded me through the darkest place I’ve ever been, the biggest catastrophe, the most tragic and unfathomable loss of my life. It’s weird to think that for the rest of my life you are never going to be here as you were.
We don’t deserve dogs. But for some reason, we get to have them for a little while, and they change our lives in untold ways. You saved mine.
You were a friend to all, a best friend, my very first dog ever, my very first Sir. Man’s best friend, indeed. Your instincts for comforting the hurting were unparalleled. Big ol’ furry fluffy floppy-eared dog head with a big ol’ dog nose, nosing your hand saying HELLO! Hello hi hi hi Hi! Til he shook you out of your bad place and dropped a slobbery tennis ball or mangled toy in your lap, and you had no choice but to throw it. And if you were in the darkest place where you couldn’t be moved, that big dog head would exhale loudly and flop into your lap, onto your leg: “I am with you. I will stay here. We are together. My nose is tremendous. I love you. Hi.”
All grief is different, and this is my first time grieving a pet, but also, all grief shares some common stuff. It makes you (re)consider all your years together, from your very first day until your very last, and what the difference is, and what all that means, and what’s next. And what you regret. And what you are so grateful for.
You leave this lifetime having changed mine for the better. You made me more present, more loving, more grateful. Thank you for being my puppy. You were the best one I ever could have found.
I like the idea of a happy meeting place where souls go when they leave us. Without proof to the contrary, I think I’ll choose to see that. I like it. Charlie finally gets to pet your best dog head. It’s only right: he named you, after all. See you when I get there, little man.
Sir Jasper Jones
2006-2019
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